Friday, November 13, 2009

Feeling good but different..

I've been working long hard hours and they actually have me feeling good in ways, I actually feel a lot like I did years ago when I was in the Army.  I feel tired and to be honest it is a rewarding tired, something that I haven't felt in a while really.  I've been feeling a great deal of negativity but that is because I've had a large volume of negative energy thrown my way over the last few weeks.  I was fortunate enough to be working alone this afternoon and I did a lot of thinking while I had the solitude of my thoughts.

I'm also feeling pretty good and content within myself after a few days of struggles and hassles with sleep and so forth. I have this very relaxed almost euphoric feeling that I've had only once in the last year and a half.  I know when I had it & why I had it back then but I'm not too sure why I have that feeling now.  I've got a suspicion the feeling is to do with a dream I had last night.  What I remember wasn't at all spectacular but it was comforting and very much reassuring for me.

I have even started making plans & working on other things too.... such as getting new brushes and paint etc as my creativity is again flowing thru me like a flooding river which has burst its banks and spread appreciably over the dry parched landscape.  Even my mind is thinking faster and clearer than it has in many years, I can't remember the last time I felt this lucid or my thoughts were so transparent to me.

I have a myriad of aches, pain and bruises but they simply seem to blur into the background like an out of focus photograph.  My energy levels are again lifting to older levels and I think that may be the onset of another stint of fitness as well as seeing a wide scope of tasks and jobs completed if I can correctly focus my energy, in the way a fireman focusses his water blasts at the base of the flames to extinguish the fire.

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